There are a lot of clichés for a loss. There are a lot of ways to say,

“We just didn’t have it tonight.”

“Luck wasn’t on our side”

“We battled. We were right there and just came up short.”

But when you come out of the pen and give up the game-winner, the only person talking is you.

It’s my worst nightmare. It’s my boogie man under the bed. it’s the scariest thing I can think of.

And that’s the only motivation I need.

The worst thing about it is letting everybody else down. I mean, we all look at our steps are ERA are whip in all the parents numbers that every stat cake has come up with.

We want the back of our baseball card to look good too.

But I give up eight runs if it meant we’d win the game because there are 24 other guys and they’re trying their hardest to make sure it’s not up to me whether we win or lose. So it’s my responsibility to make sure I try my hardest to make sure we don’t lose.

And the craziest thing is, this is baseball. We play 162 games in the last time I checked nobody is going to 161 and one.

Because even if we did and I was at fault that one loss would hurt more than anything in the world.

And not just because it would’ve ruined the first perfect season in the history of the sport.

It’s because this is my family.