After the AFC/NFC Championship games, 3 outta 7 ain’t bad until we’re left scrambling for something to say. Doesn’t help the questions are questionable at best. But after another scratchy start, we talk football for a few moments before my poor judgement of time leads down a path towards peak animated series episodes, syndication and lost sitcoms from the 20th century.

Tonight’s Trivia Answer – A 40-foot-long inflatable pig

https://rss.com/podcasts/the-terminal-podcast/2495330

Episode Treatment
Title: “The Scorpio Rises Again”

TEASER

Springfield is abuzz when Hank Scorpio, the infamous former Globex Corporation CEO, suddenly reappears after years in “strategic hiding.” In a flashy press conference, Scorpio announces a “public-private revitalization partnership” designed to turn Springfield into a “Tomorrowland of Tax Incentives.” Mayor Joe Quimby, visibly nervous but smiling, stands beside him. The town cheers—except Lisa, who immediately senses something is off.

ACT ONE

Scorpio ingratiates himself back into Springfield life with his signature charm, manic optimism, and barely concealed megalomania. Quimby fast-tracks several suspicious city contracts tied to Scorpio’s new shell company, Globex Springfield Solutions. To sell the legitimacy of the project, Scorpio recruits Rainier Wolfcastle as the public face of the initiative. In action-movie commercials, Rainier declares: “If this deal is corrupt, then I am… not corrupt!” before firing a machine gun into the air.

Behind the scenes, Scorpio secures funding from the Crazy Rich Texan, who gleefully bankrolls the scheme purely because it “ain’t got no regulations and smells like a loophole.” Their secret meetings take place in the back room of Moe’s Tavern, where Moe has been paid handsomely to provide discretion. Moe insists the hideout is foolproof—no one ever uses the ladies’ room.

ACT TWO

Homer wins a small cash prize from Moe in a bar promotion (“Drink the Most, Win the Least”), and Lisa reluctantly accompanies him to collect the money. While Homer argues with Moe about whether peanuts count as winnings, Lisa asks to use the restroom. Inside the long-abandoned ladies’ room, she overhears voices through a hole in the wall—revealing Scorpio and the Rich Texan openly discussing bribes, shell companies, and Quimby’s payoff (“Paola’s just a fancy word for freedom money!”).

Lisa races home and attempts to warn the town, but no one listens—Scorpio’s charisma and Wolfcastle’s celebrity endorsements have drowned out skepticism. Determined, Lisa brings the information to Kent Brockman, who initially dismisses it as “child journalism” until Lisa mentions Scorpio’s name and Quimby’s involvement. Brockman’s eyes light up: “I’ve been saving a blazer for this.”

ACT THREE

Kent launches a full investigative exposé, interviewing reluctant witnesses, including a panicked Moe, a confused Rainier (“Wait—this was illegal?”), and a boastful Rich Texan who accidentally incriminates himself on camera. The story explodes across Springfield media. Lisa assists Kent, earning his grudging respect and a brief on-air credit as “Lisa Simpson, Child.”

As the corruption unravels, Scorpio attempts to flee town in an over-engineered escape vehicle, only to be stopped by the collapse of his own infrastructure project. Quimby denies everything until presented with a recording of his own voice, at which point he claims diplomatic immunity “from good taste.”

TAG / EPILOGUE

With Scorpio gone once again, Springfield returns to normal. Quimby remains mayor after declaring the scandal “non-binding.” Rainier stars in a movie based on the events—playing Scorpio. Kent Brockman accepts a journalism award, thanking Lisa before quickly pivoting to promote his new segment, “Kids Say the Darnedest Indictments.”

Final gag: Moe boards up the ladies’ room hole—only for a line of women to suddenly appear outside the bar, forcing him to reopen it immediately.